Wednesday, January 07, 2009

"A Blanket with Sleeves..."

"...my life is changed forever."

Michelle, modeling the Snuggie for me and all it's wonderful qualities.

And so my life has changed too. Yes, Emily, at my request, bought me a Snuggie for Christmas.
Have you ever been lounging on your couch with a blanket and a good book and your arms suddenly started freezing? You couldn't do much because you had to continue holding your book. Have you ever had breakfast a few minutes after waking from a deep sleep and it was so cold that a blanket was a necessity? I bet your arms and upper body were chilly as you had to extend your arm outside of your warm shroud to lift the spoon to your mouth!
Well, kiss those freezing memories goodbye! If you buy a Snuggie, you'll never have ice cube arms again!
It was a close call. Emily chose to buy me a Snuggie after I sent her a spam email that I received. She purchased the Snuggie after checking off "no" to an extra Snuggie and two booklights. She was rather distraught to find, after she clicked on the "buy" button, that they had snuck on an extra 15 bucks for shipping and handling. She was even more distressed to find that the Snuggie did not arrive for Christmas. She was a little worried that it would never come. So another Christmas present and one New Year later, when she found that the forty dollar Snuggie was indeed coming, she decided that the Snuggie would be a family Snuggie! Now, I was the one feeling the tears welling.
However, to everyone's surprise, when Em opened the Snuggie box, behold, there were TWO Snuggies and TWO booklights! (Two booklights that don't work well.) Now there was a Snuggie for Emily and me!
There are many who mock Snuggies. This includes Robert Jensen along with most of the citizens of the United States. But according to an artilce on http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Snuggie, that's just because they secretly want one. I quote the site, "Snuggie is a product that you want, but you mock. Your denial that you really do want a Snuggie is just one of the things keeping you from being honest with yourself and successful in your life." It continues to say, "Admit that you watch the Snuggie infocommercial in wonder and with awe. It's a blanket; Snuggie keeps you warm. It has arms; Snuggie lets you do pleasurable things. Need to change the channel? Need to stroke your cat? The Snuggie lets you do these things, and all for the unbelievably low price of just $19.95 for two Snuggies (plus shipping and handling)."
Seriously, what's stopping you? The fact that from the back it looks like a hospital gown without the ties? Then don't walk around with it.

The fact that it's marketed with an extremely cheesy infomerical? So what. You're never cheesy sometimes? Please.
Swallow your pride and buy a Snuggie today!

3 comments:

Amber Black said...

oh amanda amanda! i canNOT believe you have one of these! jason and i are some of the people who mock these...or at least we mock the infomercial. backgammon?! come on! haha, just kidding! though i still can't believe you have one of these!

Amber Black said...

Hey Amanda...its me Jason...I tried to read this blog with my regular blanket but "my arms are trapped inside." Please let me know how it works when you wear it to a soccer game or a bonfire. :) And one size fits all! AMAZING!

Hayley Hays said...

Ugh!! SOMEone stole my idea. When I was like 5 or 6 I decided I wanted to invent something and become world-famous for it, and because I was such a nerd of a bookworm I decided I wanted to keep people's arms warm as they read in bed at night via a blanket with sleeves...my brother laughed at me when I told him my idea...I bet HE stole it and is making all the money.

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