Ramblings on Baby Number Two

Poor second babies.  You know what I mean, don't you?  I don't think I have to explain.

But, just so you know, I am definitely JUST as excited for baby # 2!  I just haven't blogged about him or her yet.  I would post the ultrasound picture of our little lemon (lemon being a good thing here, that's how big our baby is right now!), but I'm not at home at the moment and I don't have it with me.  

Even though this baby will be just two years younger than Shirley, little lemon didn't come as early as we had hoped.  But God's timing is perfect and even though it was a comparatively short wait to many, I still learned much from waiting.  And now I am actually thrilled with the two year gap.  

Little lemon is due February 4th and so I'm just into my second trimester.  Definitely more morning (really afternoon) sickness this time, and I have Gestational Diabetes again, but everything is so worth it.  I can't wait to see Shirley as a big sister!  

There are some things I am nervous about; nursing again, trying to take care of a newborn with a rambunctious two year old running around, getting two little kids in and out of the car, flying to Malawi with TWO little ones.  But, I am way more excited than nervous.  

So, that's pretty much it for today.  Just wanted to make sure that if my babies ever read this blog, they know they were all greatly anticipated.  And some of you may not have noticed the little ticker thing up top.  :)

Musings

Just thinking about Malawi today as I look at pictures of our trip that was almost a year ago!  Hard to believe.  It's also hard to believe that Kwacha's sister, Evelyn, and our niece, Charity, are going to be here in less than a month!  So exciting.

I don't have much to say today besides that, and the fact that this is one of my favorite pictures of Kwacha.  Ever.  In the middle of a tea plantation.

It's love.

Shirley wasn't such a fan.

Home Life

Sometimes I have whole heaps of things to write about, but most often words just do not come.  I think it's because life is pretty routine.  I get up, spend a little quiet time on my own, then I wake up Shirley (except she's usually already awake).  The two of us eat breakfast, I do the dishes and clean the bedroom.  Then Shirley and I spend a little time together until she goes down for her nap.  I (sometimes) work out, take a shower, eat lunch, read a little, email a little, call anyone I need to...then I wake her up again (except she's usually already awake.)  I feed Shirley her lunch and let her run around while I clean something.  Pretty soon Kwacha is home (it's so nice that he gets home around 2).  He plays with Shirley while I start dinner.  We eat, sometimes go on a hike, sometimes read, sometimes go grocery shopping (since we have the one car).  Then we come home, feed Shirley her dinner, give her a bath, put her to bed and then spend time together talking or watching I Love Lucy.  It may get routine, but I generally love it.
When I feel some complaining in my heart coming on, mostly over dishes, I try to remind myself that I am married to a fantastic husband and I have a sweet little daughter.  That's why there are dishes in the sink.  Doing dishes is now a reminder of the blessings God has given me.  Blessings I don't deserve.
Still there are times I get anxious or impatient or worried about things, mostly future things, sometimes present things.  The worst part about being anxious is...being anxious.  And yet, God tells us we don't have to be!  I mean, isn't that amazing?  We can bring anything and everything to Him and He will take care of it.  I can't remember exactly how it goes but one of my favorite quotes from Elisabeth Elliot is something like, "Restlessness and impatience affect nothing but our joy and peace."  I love that.  It's just something I have been thinking about a lot lately.
This post is starting to feel random so I think I'll just end on some random things about life:

-I started attending Every Woman's Grace about a month ago.  It's been such a blessing.  I love the Bible studies we receive each week.  The questions are deep and applicable and they really help reveal sin that I need to repent of while reminding me of the character of God.  I love the fellowship with other moms and older, wise women.  I am so thankful that my friend, Michelle, is able to drive Shirley and me.  (And her daughter Lucy is about six months older than Shirley and super sweet.  The first week they held hands in the parking lot as we were walking to the car.  ::melt::)  If you are reading this and you aren't able to go, I would suggest printing the lessons off the Grace Church website.  Especially if you don't know what to study at the moment.

-Kwacha's sister, Jellita, is coming to visit a week from tomorrow!  She's never been to the US and she will be staying for two weeks.  We have all kinds of fun things planned but mostly I am excited to see Shirley interact with her Auntie.  She LOVED her when we visited Malawi.  I am also looking forward to extended time with her so I can get to know her better.  :)  Please pray for her flight!  It is a long way to travel solo!

-And if anyone is wondering about Shirley, she's her usual cheerful, spunky self.  She can make lots of animal noises now.  She also says, All done, Oh Boy! and Hi and Buh-bye.  She blows kisses and has started to say No! after I say no.  (We're working on that one.)  She's a little independent one but still very friendly and she fills our hearts with joy.

With daddy at the zoo.

My One Year Old

Shirley is now one year old.  As of yesterday.  She's officially no longer considered a baby but a toddler!  What??!!  NO!!!!  Okay, I"m not really that sad, but it's definitely bittersweet.  I looked through a bunch of her pictures and videos yesterday along with the ones taken moments after she was born.  It made my heart hurt.  It just went by so fast.  She can never be a baby again and I now fully understand why every momma will tell you to treasure and savor each moment.  
How can I even begin to describe how much I love her?  I spent much of yesterday morning thanking God for her.  I read over Psalm 103.  It describes all that God has done for us.  He's forgiven us of ALL our sins, He's healed all of our diseases, He redeems us from the pit, He crowns us with lovingkindess and mercy.  All of that is WAY BEYOND what we deserve.  In fact, it's completely opposite of what we deserve.  And then He chooses to give us more blessings beyond all of that.  Blessings like my sweet little funny Shirley.  
She's now walking all over the place, like a little waddling penguin.  I have a bag of clothes of hers that I'm getting ready to donate (In fact, anyone have a little girl under a year that's in need of clothes?  Let me know!)  and she'll take one piece out at a time and walk around dragging it behind.  
She has started to make a surprised face all the time.  She forms her mouth into a large O and her eyes become wide as the moon.  
She blows kisses, and she finally started to give me little kisses!  She kinda just leans her mouth towards my face.  
She loves her little stuffed doggie and calls it "Dah-dee".  When I wake her up from nap time she has to grab him and bring him along.  
She loves everyone she meets and will reach out for complete strangers to hold her.  Emily let a random lady in Starbucks hold her the other day.  
I thought that being a new mom to a little baby would be so hard.  I thought I would be lonely at home.  I thought her cries would bug me.  I thought that I would get bored playing with simple toys and reading simple books to her.  I thought I would still love being a mom but I didn't realize how much!  I don't mind if she's my only company during the day.  Her cries make my heart break, even when she's crying out of sinful anger.  I could spend hours (maybe) playing with her and snuggling with her as we fight over who turns the pages of her books!  
When I woke her up yesterday morning the sudden brightness of the light caused her to look at me all squinty-eyed and she smiled a sweet little smile.  I picked her up and she snuggled her head on my shoulder for almost two minutes!  (A rare thing for this always-on-the-go girl.)  It was like a little gift to me on her birthday.  I realized her birthday is more like mine because I'm the one who got the greatest little gift the day she was born.  I'm almost in tears just thinking of it and God's goodness.  
Some wondered why Kwacha and I wanted to have a baby right away, but I don't care what anyone thinks about it.  We wouldn't have wanted it any other way.  Shirley has brought us even closer, figuring out how to care for a little newborn, noticing little bits of each of us in her face.  We get to thank God for her together and depend on Him even more for wisdom in how to raise her.  Most of all we pray that one day she might know Him, love Him and serve Him and experience that greatest joy of all, being with Him for eternity.  
Thanks for reading about Shirley this past year and sharing in our joy.  We are thankful for all of you too!

11 Months

I can't believe there is only one month left until Shirley is one year old!  This month has been full of new things for Shirley:

She has started taking steps.  She usually only takes one or two, but one day she took six or seven!  I was home alone with her and pretty much went crazy.  It might have scared her because she hasn't done it since.  I'm not really complaining though.  I know it will come soon enough!

Shirley also learned how to climb stairs (and how to get back down).  Now we have to keep a strict eye on her at my mom's house.

She copies everything her mama and daddy does.  She evens copies my mom's dogs!

Speaking of dogs, she discovered Maggie and Tacy this month and she LOVES them.  She's not afraid of them at all.  She'll pet them and stick her finger in their mouths and laugh at them.  I took her over to the back door one day when the dogs were outside and Tacy jumped up on the glass right near Shirley's face but she didn't even blink.  (Her fearlessness may not be a good thing.)

Whenever I tell Shirley "no" or say "Shirley" in a serious tone she shakes her head back and forth.

She also started saying some words and she started pointing at things in books.  Shirley loves her rubber ducky at bath time and she often will say "duh, duh" while she's playing with it.  We checked out a book from the library last week called "Time for Bed, Fred!"  It's a book about a dog finding his bed.  At one point he splashes in a mud puddle and gets all dirty so he has to take a bath.  Well, there's a rubber ducky on that page and she surprised me one day by pointing to the duck and saying "duh"!  Now every time we read it she does the same thing!
At meal times when she's in her chair I tell her to raise her arms up so that I can snap on the tray and now she'll repeat me and say "up, up".  She also loves to say "hi" and she'll wave while she says it and sometimes she'll repeat the word, "baby".

I love this little girl so much.  It's so cliche to say but it is so hard to imagine that there was a point in life where she didn't exist.  She brings her daddy and me so much joy with her sweetness and spunkiness.  I just love being her mama!

Sovereignty in the Details

During the wee hours of Sunday morning my Uncle Gary's gallbladder ruptured.  We weren't sure if there were other problems involved but it wound up only being his gallbladder.  He had surgery that night and is now in recovery and he is going to be okay.  We are all so grateful.
Another little something happened on Sunday and I hesitated in writing this at first, just because I know my own heart and how easy it is to seek attention for silly things.  But I am just so thankful to God in the way He kept my little family safe and when I think about it, it reminds me of His loving care and sovereignty.
On Sunday afternoon as we headed back home from church, Kwacha, Shirley and I got in a little accident.  We skidded a bit on some large puddles right before a giant wave hit our windshield and completely blocked our view of the road.  We crashed into yellow sand barrels, which protected us from hitting a concrete barrier, but which also sent us back into the lane.  Kwacha lost control of the car and we clipped, of all things, a tow truck!  We didn't have to wait around for CHP in the rain.  (Don't worry, we DID file a report with our insurance later that day.)  The tow truck owner was on his way back to his lot with an empty truck.  So he took us home and then took our car back to the lot with him.  Our car was definitely totaled but we all came out without a single injury, not even whiplash.
I mean, God is in the details, isn't He??  We could have crashed into anything after that wave hit our windshield, but we hit sand barrels put their for our safety.  We could have crashed into another car causing injury to others but we didn't.  Out of all cars we hit a tow truck!  His truck was fine and he was able to take us home immediately.  And on top of that, God protected my sweet husband and precious baby.
He could have not spared us and He would still be just as good and sovereign.  He could not have spared Uncle Gary and yet He would still be just as good and sovereign.  I thought of Philippians 2:7 where Paul talks about how God had mercy on Epaphroditus when He spared him from death.  He never has to spare us from death, but it is always by His mercy when He does.  I am so thankful that I serve such a loving, powerful God!

9 Months

As per usual I am a little behind again in posting about Shirley.  Poor second child.  I'm definitely not planning on doing the monthly update again, maybe just a monthly picture.  

Usually I'm the one taking the pictures around here, but the one above was taken by her daddy!  I love that you can see her little teethies.  This month Shirley started pulling herself up on furniture, my legs, the dogs...okay not the dogs, she doesn't even know the dogs, but she'll pretty much pull herself up on anything.  

This little girl is such a character.  She makes the funniest noises and faces and she finally started saying "ma ma ma".  No, she doesn't know what it means yet, but someday!  She also learned how to clap and wave to friends.

Before I fell asleep last night I was looking at the picture of when I first met Shirley.  I will never forget that moment.  All those nine months I was wondering what she'd look like and what her little personality would be, and then I was so surprised to see that to me, she didn't look like either Kwacha or me, she just looked like her own person.  And now nine months later I just can't believe there was a time when she didn't exist.  I love her so much and daily thank God for her.  He is so kind and loving to give us such wonderful gifts.

Eight Months

Shirley turned eight months right after we got home from Malawi.  A lot of things happened this month.  Shirley flew in a plane across the ocean, she started pulling herself up on furniture, and two of her teeth grew in.  (I'd let you see, but I didn't want to have to add another crying picture.)

She still has to don a headband to avoid the "he's so cute" comments. 

Shirley has definitely started to reveal that she has a...ahem...will of her own.  It is clear that she understands the word, "no."  If she starts to touch something she knows she's not supposed to touch and I say "No, Shirley," she'll stop and look at me and grunt, making it clear that she's not happy about it.  Oh dear.  It starts already.

Yep.  Mischievousness right there.

As you can see, she's still growing like a weed!  

As always we love our little Shirley girl!

Our Time in Mzuzu

It is really difficult to start a post about a two week trip to Malawi.  I've tried a couple times already!  It seems I either have to go into great detail or summarize.  I may just have to break it up into a number of posts.  We'll see.

This trip was so different than the last trip we took in 2012.  For one thing, it was twice as long.  Seriously, I can't believe we only went for six days last time and somehow managed to fit in as much as we did.  This time, half way through I kept thinking, "I can't believe that we were headed home at this point."

First off, I am so thankful that Shirley did well on the long flight.  By God's grace we were given the whole middle row on both long flights to and from Malawi, so Shirley had an extra seat all to herself. We were able to lay her down on a pillow and strap her in with the seatbelt and she could sleep or watch her little TV.  Toy Story was the movie of choice.  ;)  Then for the short flights, we took the advice of friends and put some pillows on top of the food trays and she was able to sleep.  It worked great!

So grown up!  :)

Another thing I am thankful for is that we were all healthy the whole time!  In 2012 I was having a lot of problems with my ulcerative colitis and I had a terrible cold.  It made such a difference feeling well and not being in a daze the entire time.  

The last major difference between the two trips is fairly obvious.  This time, Kwacha and I were married!  With a baby!  Last time we weren't even engaged.  It was such a blessing spending time with my new family rather than just meeting Kwacha's family.  It was wonderful having extended time with my new sisters and brother, my second mom and dad, and my nieces and to have Shirley meet them all for the first time!

The day after we arrived in Lilongwe we drove five hours north to Mzuzu where Kwacha's parents live.  The one bitter aspect of this trip is that three days before we left for Malawi, we found out that Kwacha's older brother, Granger, died.  It was very unexpected.  We're still not sure exactly what caused his death, but it sounds like it may have been a brain aneurism.  We are so thankful for God's timing though.  We had originally planned to go to Malawi in July but that didn't work out.  This way we were able to be there to help comfort the family.  Especially Shirley!  In her youthful ignorance to the situation, she was her normal, cheerful, funny self.  We truly think she helped lift everyone's spirits.   

The home in Mzuzu

Grandma (abuya) and Shirley's cousin, Chigo

Grandpa (seculu)

When we arrive in Mzuzu and got out of the car, I saw my niece, Chigo, and I started to say hi to her but she ignored me and went right for Shirley!  :)  Then she pretty much stayed by her side the rest of the trip, feeding her milk, playing with her and pretty much being a second mama.  We were happy to have her come along with us on most of our outings.  

We had such a wonderful time in Mzuzu.  We were able to stay for about three days.  We met so much of Kwacha's extended family as well.  They had all gotten back from Granger's funeral the day before and in their culture many people come to the home in order to give their condolences and comfort the family.  Groups from their church, their choir, and many other friends came.  Some would arrive wailing.  After people enter the house they greet everyone with a handshake, sometimes kneeling.  I really love this about the Malawian culture.  Everyone is so kind and respectful.  They truly show their care for each other.

Shirley with Abuya's friends

The lady on the left told my mom and me that she she is Shirley's grandma's best friend.  She talked with us for awhile and told us a little more about Malawian culture.  I really like her!

There were a few times where I didn't know where Shirley was.  On one such occasion I walked outside and found her here.  No need to worry.  ;)

Hanging out with her cousin, Charity

We were able to go on a few walks while we were there.  Kwacha, my mom and I visited Mzuzu University one morning and we saw where Kwacha's aunt used to work.  She was in charge of meals for a large group of people!  Kwacha lived with her for a year on campus so we also saw the little house they lived in.

The place where Kwacha's aunt worked

The house they lived in

Another day we went on a walk with our nieces to the Mzuzu coffee factory.  I don't drink coffee anymore but I'm told it's delicious!  It was fun seeing more of the neighborhood and watching Shirley being carried around in a chitenje by her older cousin, Ruth.  (We like to call her Hite.)

On the last night we were there, Kwacha, my mom and I walked over to the church that Kwacha's parents attend.  A traveling choir from Zambia had come and they had a friendly sing off with the local church's choir...starting around 10 p.m. at night!  One of my favorite things about this was that a number of women had their babies with them strapped on their back, fast asleep!  I loved it.  And their voices are amazing.  I will try and post a video later of their beautiful voices.

It was sad to leave the next day.  We look forward to spending more time with his parents in the future.  Kwacha loves going to Mzuzu because it's a more relaxed place than Lilongwe.  When you want to get away from Lilongwe for a bit, Mzuzu is the perfect place.  

So it looks like I couldn't write all about our trip in one post.  So there's Mzuzu for you!

Shirley at Seven Months

So I think this may be a record for me.  This might be the fastest I've ever gotten Shirley's monthly pictures up.  But we're leaving for Malawi in less than two weeks, so a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do.  

This girl is just so much fun!  I always hoped that my kids would have personality, but I always feared that they wouldn't in the end.  Well, Shirley did not disappoint.  

Shirl girl had some pretty big milestones this month.  She went from army crawling to full on crawling and she is starting to pull herself up on furniture, mostly on her knees but sometimes on her tiptoes as well.  She is quite the explorer and she is getting into everything!  But I think I said that last time.  

She also loves to talk.  Her favorite thing to say is "da da."  Every time I tell her to say "mama" she says, "da da da."  Whatever, Kwacha, she doesn't know that it means Daddy yet!

She also loves to squeal and laugh.  She loves when her daddy comes home and they get to play on the couch.  She loves walks with friends.  She still doesn't cry much unless she's really hungry or tired.

Of course we still have moments like in the picture below.  ;)  She's not a perfect angel, but we just adore her.

Seriously, could I love this kid any more than I do?

A lot of people seem surprised that she's crawling already.  I don't know what it is.  I think she has her daddy's natural strength and we do give her a lot of floor time.  Mostly because she likes it and I never wanted her to be a kid that cries as soon as you set her down.  I just never want to sound like I'm bragging.  Our kids all reach milestones at different times but in two years, they're all going to pretty much be at the same spot.  

The Bible says that "children are a blessing from the Lord."  That's all kids.  I don't find the Bible making any exceptions or caveats in that regard.  Whether your kid is happy or cranky, cries a lot or smiles a lot, he or she is a blessing.  Isn't God just so good?!

On Becoming a Wife (Lessons I've Learned from my Husband)

You can hope and dream and pray and think (a little song is coming to mind) but I just don't think you can prepare enough for marriage.  There is something about being in the actual trenches that teaches you what you really need to know.  It reminds me of my days in the teaching credential program.  We learned lots of techniques and theories and they were all great and helpful.  But I had no idea what teaching was really like until I was up in front of that classroom with live children who all had real hearts and minds and...well...ants in their pants!  (You know what I mean.)

What I could not have anticipated was how much my husband would help me become a wife.  I'm not trying to diminish anything from my mom or other faithful women in my life.  Of course I learned much from their counsel and wisdom and still do.  But what can I say?  I married well, and I couldn't have imagined all that was in store for me just by marrying Kwacha.  

So over the next few weeks I'm going to cover a different skill or trait or whatever you want to call it that has started to improve in my life because of Kwacha.  Ultimately because of God since He works in Kwacha and in me and He gave Kwacha to me.  

The topics I will cover:

(Some are obviously more vital than others and the list below is in no particular order.)

1. Cleaning
2. Time Management
3. Discipline (Working Out and Eating Healthy)
4. Appearance
5. Getting Enough Sleep
6. Raising a Child
7. Cooking
8. Scheduling
9. Forgiveness
10. Love

So stay tuned.  If I have time during Shirley's next nap, I may post one today.  
Just a little p.s.  I am in no way trying to say that I am a great example in these areas or that I have learned all there is to know.  I mean, this should be obvious without me having to state it.  I just want to be helpful in the very few small things I have learned in my short time of being a wife.  

Thanks for reading! 

Shirley at Six Months

Six months sounds even longer when it's worded "half a year".  I know everyone says it, but they say it because it's true.  It flew by!  I definitely took more pictures this month so sorry if this post is a little picture heavy.  Though apparently there are some people who read this blog because I had a couple people ask me where the six month post is, so I guess you all won't mind pictures.  :)

She's covering up her face here, but it's pretty much the only official six month picture I got with her looking at me.  

The first big thing this month is that Shirley learned how to sit up on her own for long periods of time.  She is steady now, which is nice for her.  She enjoys sitting and playing with her toys.

How am I going to discipline this child??  I will though.  I will.  Shirley also discovered cords this month and computers, phones and iPads, all of which she is not allowed to play with so the discipline has started a little bit.

My mom bought Shirley the perfect 4th of July dress.  Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures of the parade or our evening at the Tagliere's house.  (Their neighbor sets off some pretty decent fireworks.)  But I did get the dress.  

Okay enough with the 4th of July pics.

These next few are the only pictures I took of Shirley on her actual 6 month birthday.  This dress is from her Auntie Kristin and we love it!  The drooling has continued, although there is less of it, but still no teeth!

But probably the biggest new feat of Shirley's is the army crawl!  She can now get where she wants to go which means I can no longer leave her out of my sight for more than two minutes!  Oh dear.  Sometimes she get on her hands and knees and rocks back and forth and then falls forward then she repeats it.  

She has also recently started "waving".  She moves her fingers up and down over her thumb.  She'll do this right in people's faces.  Especially mine.  I'm still not sure exactly what she's trying to do when she does it, but it's super cute.  

Shirley is still our happy baby overall.  She loves to talk and growl and laugh and we love how friendly and easygoing she is.  I still can't believe that God would give such an unworthy sinner as myself such a wonderful gift!  As always, we love you Shirley Lindi!