Blessed Assurance

I am writing this post today in hopes of it being helpful to someone out there.  
Anyone who knows me well, knows that in the past I greatly struggled with assurance of salvation.  I guess I should give a little background first.  When I was five, my best friend at the time told me that to become a Christian, I had to ask Jesus into my heart.  I even remember where we were standing.  It was after school got out and we were right outside the bookstore at Grace Community Church.  I had never known a time when I did not know who Jesus is.  I was attracted to everything I knew about Him.  Why would I not want to be a Christian?  Of course I prayed the prayer with her.  Was I saved at that time?  I don't know for sure.  I can't remember what I thought about sin.  I knew I was a sinner, I knew that Jesus died for sin on the cross, but I don't remember having an understanding of repentance and turning from that sin.  

I'm also not sure when I started doubting whether I was truly saved, but I think it may have been sometime in Junior High.  That's when I started having a "quiet time."  (Time reading the Bible and praying.)  I did this with a very legalistic mindset though.  I felt that I needed to spend some time reading the Bible and then I could watch TV the rest of the night.  It was mostly a duty to me, although in High School I know I started enjoying reading the Bible.  But I remember lying in my bed at night, wondering if I should tell my mom that I was scared to die.  "If I tell her", I thought, "she will be so upset to find out that I may not be a Christian."  I'm sure I said "the prayer" over and over.  

Well, fast forward to September 11, 2001.  My family was in Hawaii on vacation.  (The only time I've ever been to Hawaii.)  It was my senior year of High School.  I remember that morning that I spent some time in the Word and I sang a few hymns on the balcony of our hotel looking out at the water.  I felt pretty good about everything.  Then my dad got a call from his boss at work and he told us to turn on the TV.  The first thing I saw was the World Trade Center on fire with the words, "America Attacked."  To say it kind of killed our vacation is an understatement.  From that moment on I was TERRIFIED.  I did not want to get on a plane to go home for fear that terrorists would take over our plane as well!  (However unlikely that would have been.)  I was extremely afraid to die.  So what did that have to say about my salvation?  

For years after that I struggled.  I started doubting everything, including whether or not God existed.  I desperately wanted to believe that He did, but I just wasn't sure.  How could I be saved if I was doubting even God's existence?  Sometimes I couldn't eat.  I thought that if God determined from the beginning of time who would be saved, and He had decided not to save me, then what was the point in living?  Except I was terrified to die so suicide was definitely not an option.  I felt scared and trapped and deeply depressed.  Things only started turning around when I poured out my heart to God and spent time reading His Word.  

Can I say that I think every person raised in the church needs to deal with these questions at some point?  It's not enough to say that if we have Christian parents we are Christian's.  No one is born a believer, we are all born sinners, hating God and loving our own sin.  

I remember later on that year, my High School Bible study leader asked to hear my testimony and at the end he said, you didn't mention anything about your sin.  This sent me into waves of terror again, but it was a good question.  I knew I was a sinner but did I really understand that it was so awful that I was deserving hell because of it?  

In college I really wrestled with this concept of sin and a new worry was forming.  Was I sorry enough for my sin?  I rarely cried over my sin.  Did I hate it enough?  Did I really repent if I wasn't constantly in tears over it?  

I found this quote sometime in college and it's been in a notebook of mine ever since.  I read it in Saved Without a Doubt by John MacArthur.  The main quote is from Ironside.  I don't know his first name, I just have Ironside written down.  :)  It goes like this:

"Test yourself in this way.  You once lived in sin and loved it.  Do you now desire deliverance from it?  You were once self-confident and trusting in your own fancied goodness.  Do you now judge yourself as a sinner before God?  You once sought to hide from God and rebelled against His authority.  Do you now look up to Him, desiring to know Him, and to yield yourself to Him?  IF you can honestly say "yes" to these questions, you have repented...and remember, it is not the amount of repentance that counts; it is the fact that you turn from self to God that puts you in the place where His grace avails through Jesus Christ.  Strictly speaking, not one of us have ever repented enough.  None of us has realized the enormity of our guilt as God sees it.  But when we judge ourselves and trust the Savior whom He has provided we are saved through His merits.  As recipients of His lovingkindness, repentance will be deepened and will continue day by day, as we learn more and more of His infinite worth and our own unworthiness."  

And John added to that, "Do you see the impulses of the new nature in your life?  If so, that's indicative of salvation.  If God's will has become your highest joy, and submission to His lordship your greatest delight, you are indeed a child of God - no matter how strong the pull of sin."  

A few years later I was still struggling when I was at the Resolved conference. One night we sang "Rock of Ages" and it became one of my favorite hymns.  

Here are a couple of verses:

Rock of Ages, cleft for me,
Let me hide myself in Thee;
Let the water and the blood,
From Thy riven side which flowed,
Be of sin the double cure,
Cleanse me from its guilt and power.

Not the labors of my hands
Can fulfill Thy law's demands;
Could my zeal no respite know,
Could my tears forever flow,
All for sin could not atone;
Thou must save, and Thou alone. 

John MacArthur has another saying that I have always loved, "It's not perfection, but direction."  

These things were all helpful but I think the thing that really helped settle me was dwelling on God's love for me and what Jesus did on the cross.  I finally realized that good works did not come from trying really hard.  Good works can NEVER save you.  That's super comforting because we can never do enough good works.  God saved me by His grace alone.  He gave me faith in Him.  And because of that faith and that joy that comes from that knowledge, I am a new person.  I want to obey!  It's from the heart!  It's not perfect.  Go read Romans 7.  But that new heart is there!  

A recent joy has been studying 1 John at Every Woman's Grace.  This book, like no other, has deepened my assurance.  That's why it was written!  (1 John 5:13 - "I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life.")  A true believer believes that Jesus is the Son of God, they obey Him and they love others.  It's as simple as that.  Is that obedience and love perfect right now?  No, but it's there and growing and one day will be made perfect when we see Christ face to face!  

I love what Andrew Gutierrez (the previous High School pastor at GCC) would often say:
Something like, "When we are saved the rest of our life we live in obedience as a big 'thank you' back to God."

I'll end with "Blessed Assurance"

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! 
O what a foretaste of glory divine! 
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.

Refrain:
This is my story, this is my song,
praising my Savior all the day long;
this is my story, this is my song, 
praising my Savior all the day long.

Perfect submission, perfect delight,
visions of rapture now burst on my sight;
angels descending bring from above
echoes of mercy, whispers of love.

Perfect submission, all is at rest;
I in my Savior am happy and blest,
watching and waiting, looking above
filled with His goodness, lost in His love.

If you're reading this and you don't truly know God or you are doubting whether or not you do, please please please talk to someone who does know Him!  

One last thing.  (Okay I guess I didn't really end up there.)  I am so thankful for the body of Christ, the church.  God gives us fellow believers to comfort, strengthen, lovingly rebuke and encourage.  There are SO MANY people over the years that really helped me with all this and I feel like I have to mention them!  

My High School small group leader, Holly.  I must have driven her crazy with my constant questions and concerns, but she was so patient and loving.  Christen, one of my best friends growing up. My college roomie and High School friend, Melissa.  My college Bible study leader and his wife, Clint and Kim.    They had me over one night to their place and gave me many verses and helped me think through things and they talked with me other times too.  Heather.  She talked with me at a college retreat once and wrote me a super long email that I still have to this day somewhere. Beth, one of my Junior High teachers and later I had her in college too!  She talked with me in her office one day.  Glenna, Nicole and Mariejtie.  All three of them discipled me in and after college.  My pastors and the many helpful sermons they preached, John MacArthur and Rick Holland.  And most of all my parents and sister.  They put up with everything for years!  And they were so patient and loving and helpful all the way through.  There are so many others.  God used each of you in my life and I am so thankful. 

New Year

New Year's Resolutions.  I'm finally talking about them in February.  Have you been asked if you made any yet?  I think I've been asked two or three times and I had to admit that I hadn't made any.  It seems like people are either passionately for them or aggressively against them.  I wouldn't say that I fit either of the extremes but I would tend toward the latter.  I'm not against making new year's resolutions by any means.  It's good to sit back and evaluate where you are at and where you'd like to be.

It's been discussed before but the main reason I typically don't make them is because after January I tend to forget about them.  The hype ends in February and you get back into the normal, daily routine of life.  

I found some statistics about new year's resolutions on the ole internet.  

45% of American's usually make them.

8% of American's are successful in achieving them.  

But, "People who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don't explicitly make resolutions."

(All of my info was found from www.statisticbrain.com).

Why do we make resolutions at all?

Hopefully, for a believer, the ultimate purpose is to grow in godliness and glorify God.

So, I finally came up with one.  Just one.  I think one single resolution will help me actually attain it and put things in focus.  And it's a resolution that will help make all other pursuits possible and bring about real change and that is to be faithful in prayer.

I read a really helpful devotional by Elizabeth Elliot this morning about prayer.  I'll copy some of it here:

"'If you, bad as you are, know how to give your children what is good for them, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask Him?' (Matt. 7:11, NEB).  Are you often tempted as I am to doubt the effectiveness of prayer?  But Jesus prayed.  He told us to pray.  We can be sure that the answer will come, and it will be good...Prayer is a weapon.  Paul speaks of the 'weapons we wield' in 2 Cor. 10:4-5.  They are 'not merely human, but divinely potent to demolish strongholds' (NEB)...The Destroyer himself, [urges] me to quit using the weapon he fears so intensely."  

From Keep A Quiet Heart

Prayer is effective.  God is faithful to answer.  He tells us to pray.  And Satan fears it.  

I finished out the last few months of 2014 spending much more time in the Word but by the time my hour or so was up every morning before I needed to get Shirley out of bed, I hadn't spend more than about a minute or two praying to God.  This morning I decided to get out my journal and write down things to pray for using the old A.C.T.S. method (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication) and then I spend some time praying through those things. What a difference it makes spending time talking to our God!

It's actually been about a week since I started this post.  Things are still going well.  (I would hope so after only a week.)  Isn't it amazing that God wants to hear from us?  And that He actually listens to us and answers our prayer??  The God of the universe!  That in itself should convict us and lead us to prayer.  Do any of you readers out there have any little things that help you to be faithful in prayer?  I'd love to hear!

Shirley at Five Months

Anyone can see by that nice little ticker above that I am once again late in posting about Shirley.  And once again I only had one post in between this one and the last monthly update on Shirley.  But stay tuned.  I will have a new easy little recipe up soon.  One that has (kinda) brought ice cream back into my life.  Anyway, on to Shirley.  

This time, I didn't touch up the pictures at all.  I am currently taking a free online Photoshop class and  I'm spending so much of my free time watching those lessons that I just don't have time to fix these up.  I just need to get them on here.  I don't have a baby book yet, so this is kind of my only way right now to remember how Shirley is developing.  And yes, probably only family and a few close friends care but why am I apologizing?  Look at that cute face!

Who me?

Attacking her dog.  Shirley has become much more aware of her toys this month.  She's finally playing with them!

And she's beginning to sit up with help.  She actually does pretty good balancing with no help, not even from a boppy pillow, for about ten seconds maybe.

But toppling is still the norm.

The classic picture with her dog.

Do we really have to do this again?

These days she's putting EVERYTHING into her mouth.

She is just so curious about everything.  She is always looking around.  

She's also drooling a lot.  We think she's teething due to the drooling, biting and other symptoms.  But she's still our happy baby!

She's also laughing all the time.  The other morning I was sitting in our living room eating my breakfast and I could hear her laughing to herself in her crib.  Most mornings I play the piggy game with her toes and I have been waiting for her to laugh when I say "Whee whee whee whee whee, all the way home" as I tickle her.  She finally did it today!

I know I say it every time, but I just love her!  I can't imagine wanting to do anything else than stay at home and be her mom.  I can't believe I get to call it my job!  I thank God for her every day and for the privilege of being her mom.  I also pray daily that God would save her at a young age and give her a love for Him and a desire to serve Him with her life.

Hubba Hubby

 

I've written a lot about the cute little peanut on the way lately, but nothing about my amazing husband.  (And I don't know about you, but I kinda think he looks like a model in the picture up there.)

 

 

I don't even know where to start in explaining to you the kind of man he is.  (Is it bad to brag about your husband?)

 

Anyway, I will just start with a list of things that I have come to love and appreciate about him.  Things I have discovered since we've been married.  Well, I'm sure I saw hints of some of these things before we were even married.

 

• He makes dinner for us when I'm tired.
• He helps me do the dishes.
• Sometimes he even helps me cook.
• He is a really good communicator.
• He helps keep me calm.  A couple of my friends in high school used to call me "Spaz." Not a nickname I appreciated at all, but if I'm being honest, it was true.  I still tend to spaz out if I see a bug in our apartment, or I drop a glass bowl, or I spill something all over the floor.  At other times my temper will come out and Kwacha is just really good at nipping it and reminding me why I DON'T NEED TO FREAK OUT!  (Except he never yells at me.)
• He never yells at me.
• He. doesn't. snore. Seriously!  Read that again!  I used to joke about how if someone ever proposed to me, before responding I would ask if they snore.  When I was younger and our family went on vacation and had to share a hotel room, my dad would snore and I...would cry.  Literally.  I also hate wearing ear plugs.  Seriously, why is God so kind to me.
• He makes sure I eat correctly.  Which is important with ulcerative colitis and gestational diabetes.  I don't always like it at the time, but in the long run I'm very thankful.
• He's affectionate.
• He prays for our daughter.
• He always prays for family/friends at dinner.
• He insists I call him if I ever get home late at night so that he can meet me outside before I get out of my car.
• He thinks and cares about other people. 
• He likes match-making as much as I do.  ;)
• He'll watch shows and movies I like.  Including some chick flicks. 
• He's a leader.  He is faithful to make sure we read together.  Right now it's Proverbs. 
• He seeks after wisdom.
• He is wise!
• He thinks before he speaks and acts.
• He carries the grocery bags, or anything remotely heavy, for me.

Okay, this is even easier than I thought it would be.  It's just flowing.  So I'll stop there for now.  But I can always make another list!  ;)

 

I love you, Kwacha!

Mini Journals

So I saw this idea on one of my favorite blogs these days, A Beautiful Mess, and I thought it could be a nice little gift for those wonderful girls you read about last week.

They are super easy to put together and you can put them in your purse as little "to-do" jourals.  You could also use one for prayer requests, or short lists.  Jenn, the girl that lives with us, writes down quotes people say or other things she wants to remember.

Instead of using magazines for these, I used pictures from a vintage looking California book that I picked up at a garage sale.  It is full of old pictures of Cali.  Then I added stickers for their initials. The spines are covered with washi tape.

Makes for a fun quick project.  ;)

(I'll get these to you soon, Kristin and Amber!)

A litte quote...

What does your time in prayer look like?

I read a convicting quote recently.  My friend, Jessica, posted it.

"A man is what he is on his knees before God—and nothing more." - Robert Murray McCheyne

Ouch.

Robery Murray McCheyne is one of Andrew Gutierrez's (the high school pastor at GCC) favorite authors.  I haven't read anything by him but now I want to.

I have come to the realization that with the way my mind works these days, I have to write things down to focus.  People may scoff at the amount of notes I take on Sundays, but my primary purpose for that is that it helps me pay attention and stay focused.

The notebook above is a prayer journal that I was sharing with a friend for awhile, lately I've been using it to take notes, but now I am converting it back to a personal prayer journal.  I hope it helps me.  I so WANT to be faithful in prayer. I want to know that closeness with the Lord and peace that results from bringing everything to Him.

I want to see prayers answered, to have my faith grown, to bring other's needs to God and trust in His sovereignty.

Would you do me the honor of praying about this for me?  And ask me when you see me how it's going?

Thank you.

I need it.

Update: Andrew just sent this to the high school staff. Perfect timing!
http://desiringgod.org/resource-library/conference-messages/cultivating-private-prayer-as-a-pastor

Life

The above picture is a shot of the plant in my room, from it's good side.  I am notorious for killing plants.  A green thumb I do not have.  But this one has managed to live for over a year!  A lady at work gave it to me last Christmas as a "Secret Sibling" gift.  I take unnecessary pride in this plant; unnecessary in the sense that I have really had nothing to do with keeping it alive.  I water it occasionally.  And I placed it near the window where it can get a little sun.  That's it. (1 Corinthians 3:7 - "So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth.")  And like I said before, this is it's good side.  The plant is not nearly as vibrant as it could be, because even though it's right near my bed and I see it every day, I still forget to water it. 

I find it fascinating (but I guess not all that surprising) how many things in creation are pictures of God and our relationship with Him.  The sun (and I've probably written about this before) is the center of the solar system.  The planets revolve around it and it is the source of light just like Christ is the center of our lives and He is the source of light: knowledge, holiness and glory.

In Proverbs, sluggards are told to go the ant and learn how to work.

Same goes for plants.  Psalm 1:2-3 says, "But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.  He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither.  In all that he does, he prospers."

If I forget to water my plant or open the shades it starts to die.  The plant needs that water and light!  Same goes with me.  If I don't drink God's Word each day and bask in His light, I start to smell of death.  Sin is right there.  But with some water and sun, with the Word, life is renewed!  It's amazing to see how well my little plant improves when I cut off the dead leaves and give it something to drink.  Same goes with the refreshment I receive from God's Word and time spent in prayer with Him!

2 Corinthians 4:6 "For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," has shown in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ."

So drink up friends!  Enjoy your day!

That time of year...

Resolutions?  Yes, no, maybe so?  Well when New Year's rolled around I felt that it was almost pointless to make resolutions since I find such difficulty in keeping them.  Plus the whole idea just sometimes seems a little....cheesy to me.  What has happened to me and the idea of cheesiness??  In the last couple years I have wanted as little to do with cheesiness as possible.  But I think I've gone to the other extreme. 

This last weekend we had high school winter camp.  The topic was the glory of God.  To bring God glory should be my utlimate goal and resolution, which I cannot do apart from Jesus and the Holy Spirit working in me. 
1 Corinthians 10:31 "So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." 
Romans 11:33-36 "Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God!  How unsearchable are His judgments and how inscrutable His ways!  'For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been His counselor?' 'Or who has given a gift to Him that he might be repaid?' For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things.  To Him be glory forever.  Amen."

Any resolutions I make this year should stem from this.  And it has become more and more clear to me in the last two weeks that I HAVE to make goals and plans in order to grow and truly bring God glory with my life.  If I don't plan anything it's not going to happen.  A friend asked me recently, "What are your plans for this year?"  And I didn't have much of an answer.  Lame!  The very next day I was reading a book that my wonderful boss gave me and the author was talking about the importance of setting goals to grow. 

So, at camp I decided that it might be a good idea to break up my day/areas in which I am involved and see in what ways I need to grow.  That may be a way to figure out some goals and plans to make. 
For me that looks like:
God
Family/Home
Work
Church/High School Group/Evangelism
Friends
Entertainment
Food
Sleep/Rest
Finances

Right off the top of my head I know that in my relationship with God I want to wake up at 5 every morning and spend time with Him in His Word and in prayer.  I want to read through the Bible this year, but faster than one year.  Maybe a few months or more.  I want to spend the majority of my time in the car praying to Him or singing to Him. 
With Family/Home I want to help my mom around the house more.  Be more involved with cleaning and cooking, etc. 
At Work I want to be focused on paying attention to what I am doing.  I want to make sure that I don't draw attention to myself at lunch by trying to be funny or whatever.  I want to take interest in other people.  I also want to take a couple of lunches every week to read. 
With Church/High School/Evangelism I want to faithfully pray for those on staff and the girls in my small group.  I want to choose a day or two in the week where I specifically plan to pray for them.  Same goes with missionaries and people I want to tell about Jesus.  To be realistic, I'd like to start off with telling someone the gospel at least once a month.  I know it should be more, but I want to start off with more than last year. 
With Friends I want to be more purposeful in our conversations.  To ask more faithfully how I can pray for them and then to actually do that! 
With Entertainment I want to be much more discerning in what I watch.  I want to ask myself, "Is what I'm watching glorifying to God?"  If I can't find any way in which it is, I shouldn't be watching it! 
With Food I need to come up with a plan for eating healthy and stick with it.  With the disease I have this is necessary and yet I forget that it is.  I would like to have self control in this area.  I'd also like to spend less in eating out.  In order to do this I really need to come up with how much I should spend a month and stick with it. 
With Sleep and Rest it's pretty simple.  I need to go to bed earlier!  I would like 6 or 7 hours of sleep a night.  If I get up at 5 that means I need to go to bed between 10 and 11.  That means I need to start going upstairs between 9:30 and 10 and that means getting off of FB by 10 for sure! 
And finally with Finances I need to make a budget and stick with that.

Well, again, those are plans that come to mind immediately.  I know that I could come up with more and probably other categories.  But this is a place to start.  It's also probably more than you wanted to know, but I am thankful to have a spot where I have recorded this and now you all can keep me accountable! 

So, what have you decided to do this year as far as resolutions?  What has helped you in the past?  I want to know readers!  Now is the time for you to finally comment!  har har...

God is Jealous

This convicted me the other morning. I highly recommend this book. Spurgeon's affection for Jesus was so evident!

September 12 - Morning by Morning - C.H. Spurgeon
"God is jealous." — Nahum 1:2

Your Lord is very jealous of your love, O believer. Did He choose you? He cannot bear that you should choose another. Did He buy you with His own blood? He cannot endure that you should think that you are your own, or that you belong to this world. He loved you with such a love that He would not stop in heaven without you; He would sooner die than you should perish, and He cannot endure that anything should stand between your heart's love and Himself. He is very jealous of your trust. He will not permit you to trust in an arm of flesh.

He cannot bear that you should hew out broken cisterns, when the overflowing fountain is always free to you. When we lean upon Him, He is glad, but when we transfer our dependence to another, when we rely upon our own wisdom, or the wisdom of a friend — worst of all, when we trust in any works of our own, He is displeased, and will chasten us that He may bring us to Himself. He is also very jealous of our company. There should be no one with whom we converse so much as with Jesus. To abide in Him only, this is true love; but to commune with the world, to find sufficient solace in our carnal comforts, to prefer even the society of our fellow Christians to secret intercourse with Him, this is grievous to our jealous Lord.

He would fain have us abide in Him, and enjoy constant fellowship with Himself; and many of the trials which He sends us are for the purpose of weaning our hearts from the creature, and fixing them more closely upon Himself. Let this jealousy which would keep us near to Christ be also a comfort to us, for if He loves us so much as to care thus about our love we may be sure that He will suffer nothing to harm us, and will protect us from all our enemies. Oh that we may have grace this day to keep our hearts in sacred chastity for our Beloved alone, with sacred jealousy shutting our eyes to all the fascinations of the world!

"Christ is All"

Valley of Vision prayer I read this morning:

O Lover to the uttermost,
May I read the meltings of Thy heart to me
in the manger of Thy birth,
in the garden of Thy agony,
in the cross of Thy suffering,
in the tomb of Thy resurrection,
in the heaven of Thy intercesssion.

Bold in this thought I defy my adversary,
tread down his temptations,
resist his schemings,
renounce the world,
am valiant for truth.

Deepen in me a sense of my holy relationship to Thee,
as spiritual bridegroom,
as Jehovah's fellow,
as sinners' Friend.

I think of Thy glory and my vileness,
Thy majesty and my meanness,
Thy beauty and my deformity,
Thy purity and my filthiness,
Thy righteousness and my iniquity.

Thou has loved me everlastingly, unchangeably,
may I love Thee as I am loved;
Thou hast given Thyself for me,
may I give myself to Thee.
Thou hast died for me,
may I live to Thee
in every moment of time,
in every movement of my mind,
in every pulse of my heart.

May I never dally with the world and its allurements,
but walk by Thy side,
listen to Thy voice,
be clothed with Thy grace,
and adorned with Thy righteousness.

30 for 30

I have a confession to make...
I like clothes.
You can always find people to compare yourself to. There are those who shop way more than I do and have walk in closets full of clothes, and there are those like Charlie Brown. You may wonder if they only have one outfit. Period.
Either way, I need to break the sinful habits of overspending, lack of self control, vanity, the list goes on. Obviously I cannot fight any sin apart from God. Dependence on Him in prayer. He also uses violent language in the Bible...He tells us to cut off our hand or eye if it causes us to sin. I wouldn't say this experiment is going nearly that far. And I have to admit...this is kind of a fun way to work on this, because I can take pictures and blog about it and such. But I digress. Let me explain the 30 for 30 project.

I did not come up with this idea. I saw it on two other blogs. But I thought it would be just the thing for me to try in the month of July! You pick 30 pieces of clothing from your wardrobe and you can only use those pieces to make 30 outfits for a whole month. (And July just happens to have 31 days so...extra challenge! Ha.) It teaches you to "shop your closet" and to see just how much you really don't need that super cute blue sweater from Anthropologie.
So without further ado...my 30 picks:

3 pairs of shorts

2 pairs of work pants

2 white tanks

3 sweaters (for the sometimes chilly office or church basement)

A couple of t-shirts and nice shirt that got left out of the "nice shirt" pic

2 pairs of jeans

4 skirts

2 dresses

4 tops

and 5 tanks

Well! I think those oughta last me just fine! Really I'm kinda embarrassed that I even own this many clothes. I can already tell I don't need anymore! Stay tuned for updates on Project 30 for 30!

Prayer

I really love going to night church and last night especially. It was the second part of a two part sermon that John did and I missed the first one, so I was glad he did a review. It was on God's sufficient grace in trials and it was so uplifting. It was one of those messages where I feel like I just want to sit there forever and stay in that frame of mind. It's so easy to get up and get involved in a conversation with somebody that doesn't have anything to do with the message and then forget what you just heard. Anyway, we were reminded about how we are often driven to times of intense prayer when we are faced with a very difficult trial and, in a way, it's a sad commentary on our lives that it takes something like an extremely difficult trial to bring us to that point of such dependence on God.
This reminded me of something that I have been thinking and reading about recently. God tells us all throughout the Bible to pray to Him and to bring our requests before Him. To bring everything before Him. And He tells us that if we ask Him anything in His name (according to His will) He hears us and answers us.

Matthew 7:11 "If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!"
Luke 11:13 "...how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!"
Matthew 21:22 "And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith."
Mark 11:24 "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."
John 14:13 "Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son."
John 15:16 "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, He may give it to you."
John 16:24 "Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full."
Ephesians 3:20 "Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us..."
James 1:5-6 "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind."
1 John 5:14-15 "And this is the confidence that we have toward Him, that if we ask anything according to His will He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of Him."

Again, why do I not come more often to God in prayer?! He has given us who know Him every spiritual blessing. I find it extremely encouraging, for example, that it is God's will that people be saved. It's also His will that I tell others about Him. If I pray that He would give me boldness to evangelize for His name's sake, and I pray for wisdom in this area with no doubting, then He promises to answer! He hears us! If I am seeking to honor Him in my life, in regards to a job, and I pray that He lead me and guide me to do what He wants me to do...and I pray about this with faith, He will answer! It's so comforting to know this! And I hope that anyone reading this may be encouraged as well. God is faithful!

What a Friend

I have really been struggling with setting my mind on God throughout the day at school. It seems like everything moves so fast there and my mind is focusing on teaching and what I have to do next and I start trying to do everything completely on my own.
Rick Holland's message on Sunday night was so good about knowing God. I really do want to be thinking about Him throughout the day. For some reason this hymn has been super helpful.

What a Friend We Have in Jesus

What a friend we have in Jesus, All our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry Ev'rything to God in prayer!

Oh, what peace we often forfeit, Oh what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry Ev'rything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?

We should never be discouraged, Take it to the Lord in prayer:

Can we find a friend so faithful Who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus Knows our every weakness, Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, Cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Saviour, still our refuge; Take it to the Lord in prayer:

Do thy friends despise, forsake thee? Take it to the Lord in prayer;

In His arms He'll take and shield thee; Thou wilt find a solace there.

It helps to know that I can pray to God about anything throughout the day. Listening to this hymn in the morning on the way to school helps me to think about how God is present with me throughout the day and He knows everything that I am doing or thinking about. Nothing is hidden from Him.